My mother’s past
Fades into my daughter’s future
They are my present
My daughter turns nineteen today. We are going to celebrate by taking her out for her first legal drink tonight. It is exciting to watch her take another step into adulthood and I am delighted that she is wanting to share this milestone with her mother. She is a beautiful, brave young woman, and I am privileged to observe and be a part of her ride through life, with all its ups and downs.
But in observing her ups I am sometimes forced into a down of my own. While she stands on the brink of a long life full of promise and dreams I find myself awash in a life filling up with memories and longings for things that were or might have been. Her passages bring home the passage of time as it moves inexorably forward and I can’t help but think “No, Mick, time is not on my side”.
How do you stave off this thief that is Time? You can try to keep him locked behind bars by ‘living in the moment’ with courage and enthusiasm, being ‘present’ to all that is around you. But how do you ignore him when he reaches his hands out from the bars, waving birthdays and benchmarks at you? You can turn your face away, but the wind he creates will blow stealthily from behind your neck, sending shivers of apprehension down your spine. Or you can unlock the bars and hug him to you. Take away his power for grief by embracing the beauty in change and the ephemeral.
My daughter turns nineteen today. We are going to have a drink together and toast the beauty in this life we are sharing and experiencing, each in our own way.